A good place to begin is with the way you speak to yourself. Your inner dialogue can be the most supportive friend or your harshest critic. Pay attention to the words you use about yourself. Replace “I’m such a failure” with “I’m learning and improving.” It might feel awkward at first, but over time, these small shifts create a more compassionate and confident mindset.
Spending time with people who lift you up can also work wonders for your self-esteem. Have you ever noticed how the energy of those around you affects your mood? Negative, critical people can drain your confidence, while supportive, encouraging individuals inspire you to believe in yourself. Choose your company wisely. Surround yourself with those who celebrate your wins and remind you of your worth when you forget. If you don’t have those kinds of relationships yet, don’t be discouraged—join groups, communities, or classes where you can meet like-minded, positive people.
Another surprisingly effective strategy is to start keeping promises to yourself, no matter how small. It could be as simple as committing to drink more water or taking a five-minute walk each day. Following through builds trust with yourself. When you consistently keep these promises, you start seeing yourself as someone reliable and capable. It’s like strengthening a muscle—the more you do it, the stronger your sense of self becomes.
And let’s talk about comparison—one of the quickest ways to drain your self-esteem. It’s so easy to get caught up in comparing your life to others, especially in the age of social media. But what you see online is often a curated highlight reel, not the full story. Instead of comparing, focus on your own path. Celebrate your progress, no matter how small it seems. You’re not in competition with anyone else—your journey is uniquely yours.
Don’t underestimate the power of doing things that genuinely make you happy. When you engage in activities you enjoy, you naturally feel more fulfilled and confident. Whether it’s painting, cooking, hiking, or dancing around your living room, carving out time for things you love reminds you of your own value. It’s a way of telling yourself, “I’m worth this time and effort.”
Self-esteem isn’t built overnight, and it’s not about being perfect—it’s about learning to see yourself as worthy just as you are. Every small effort you make adds up, like drops of water filling a jar. Keep at it, even when it feels difficult. You’re more resilient, capable, and deserving than you realize, and with a little patience, you’ll start to see it for yourself.